Watching him walk away is probably one of the most heartbreaking scenes you’ve ever seen. It’s bad enough when it happens in your favorite romantic comedy. Now it’s happening to you.
You loved him. You still do. He doesn’t feel the same way anymore, if he ever did.
Here are a few steps you can take to begin working through your grief and finally, gradually, start to let him go of him for good.
Let yourself grieve
If you are going to ever get over him completely, you need to allow yourself all the time you need to express your emotions. Listen to his favorite song and have a good, long cry. Eat as much mint chocolate chip ice cream as you want. Find someone you can share your feelings with and confide in without having to worry about being judged. Write your thoughts out in a journal.
This process is a lot harder to start than it is to complete. Whatever you have to do to make yourself feel better, within reason, do it. You will feel vulnerable and over-emotional. It does not mean you are weak. In fact, facing your feelings and finding ways to express them is a sign of great strength.
Did he use the “we can still be friends” line on you? Maybe the two of you agreed to stay friends. After all, sometimes just because a little romance between the two of you didn’t work out doesn’t mean you have to say goodbye forever.
Staying in touch after the romance ends can lead to unwanted temptation to “try again,” though, even when both of you know you shouldn’t.
It’s okay to delete him. Unfriend or unfollow him on social media. Delete his number from your phone. If he keeps texting or messaging you, to the point where you have to block him, don’t feel guilty. You have to do what you have to do to move on. It isn’t about him anymore: focus on you and what you need.
Embrace the single life
The best thing you can do for yourself now is to embrace your new life being single. You don’t have to worry about anyone else now. You don’t have to please anyone. You don’t have to feel obligated to spend time with anyone or take time out of your day to do something nice just for the sake of showing him you love him.
Go out with your friends. Take a trip. Do something fun on your own or with people who still love and care about you. You don’t have to focus on anyone else but you right now. Instead of letting it drag you down, make the most of it. Someday you will find someone new, but for right now, treat and love yourself. You deserve it.
He’s made his decision and he’s not going to change his mind. Sure, it hurts. Heartbreak can take a long time to get over. Let yourself grieve, and do what you have to do to start feeling okay again. You will find someone new … eventually.
Top image courtesy of mrhayata/flickr.com.
Middle image courtesy of Antoine K/flickr.com.