Have you ever wanted to join a sorority in college but something held you back? For many women, that something is their non-Greek boyfriend. But having a boyfriend shouldn’t stop you from joining a sorority. In fact, if balanced correctly, it can enhance a relationship! Follow CL’s five tips to make having a non-Greek boyfriend and being in a sorority a reality.
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1. Trust each other. Trust is the most important component of any relationship, especially when you’re in a sorority. Sorority membership is a very social commitment that exposes you to many different types of people at mixers, philanthropy events, date nights, etc. Make sure your boyfriend trusts that you aren’t going to these events for the wrong reasons. If you are at these events just to meet and flirt with fraternity men, then you should not be in a relationship.
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2. Invite him to events. Invite your boyfriend to your chapter’s events so he can see the women you hang out with and all the good your sorority does on campus. He will appreciate feeling included and will know that you aren’t forgetting about him. These events can be used to make even more memories with one another, like attending a sorority formal or philanthropy.
3. Communicate with him. This is essential to having a boyfriend who is not in Greek life with you. My boyfriend is a college baseball player an hour away and I am active in a sorority on my campus, so we both have incredibly busy schedules. Communicate regularly so that you still feel in the loop with each other’s lives. This is as easy as sending a few texts throughout the day or a phone call at night.
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4. Be honest. There is nothing worse than lying to your boyfriend about what you are doing or where you are. Honesty goes hand-in-hand with communication and trust. One thing I cannot stress enough is to be truthful about where you are going. I have seen sorority women use events as an excuse when really they are going to a fraternity’s party. Being honest about where you are going or what you are doing is the best way to foster a relationship while being in a sorority.
5. Take time off. Being involved in a sorority sometimes feels like a 24 hour job and to a boyfriend, this is a scary concept. Not all sorority events are mandatory. It is okay to skip optional events occasionally to spend time with your boyfriend. Your sorority sisters will applaud your ability to balance a loving and healthy relationship with sorority membership.
Me and my boyfriend, Kurt, at my chapter’s presents
Having a boyfriend who isn’t familiar with Greek life can be a challenge. He can change your mind about joining, or get you to drop out if he doesn’t see all the positives of being involved. A boyfriend fears that once you join a sorority, you will be too busy for him or just forget about him. Alleviate his fears by following these five essential steps. As long as you build trust between the two of you and balance both parts of your life correctly, a relationship and sorority membership is possible!
Kaitlyn Dillen is an Intern for College Lifestyles ™. She is a junior majoring in Journalism at Sacramento State in Sacramento, California. Katie is a member of Delta Gamma and serves on the National Panhellenic Council as the Vice President of Recruitment for the 2012 year. She loves to spend her days reading magazines, listening to good music, and being surrounded by the people she loves!
