Classy DO’s and DON’Ts of Breaking Up

A bad break-up has happened to the best of us. Whether it was faded love or a best friend telling you what your man really has been up to, it hurts all the same. Breaking up in college may be hard, but what matters most is how you deal with it.

If you’re coping with a break-up and feeling a lot like Carrie Bradshaw in the first Sex and the City movie, I am here to tell you: YOU WILL BE FINE! I know how it feels to have your heart ripped out and stomped on…again and again. But when it came time for me to pick up the pieces, I learned a few ways to cope.

Here are five steps to get back to the classy girl you know you are without the cliché “eat ice cream and watch romantic comedies” idea that never works.

I can sit here all day and say don’t cry! But it’s going to happen and the sooner it does the better. Let those tears run wild for a day or two because building them up inside is never a sure way to deal with emotions. Find a friend who will sit there and let you sob all over her new sweater. Being around people who care for you will remind you how blessed you are, even without that boy in your life.

This is the time to think about you and only you. Get a pedicure, go see that movie you have been dieing over when the trailer plays, lay in bed all day, do something you have been wanting to cross of your bucket list. If you plan on eventually moving on you need to first learn to love yourself again.

With today’s society full of up-to-the-second status updates, it’s likely Facebook will announce your break-up before you personally do. Although you may realize that it could be so much worse after looking at the tabloids. Find inspiration by looking up to women who are still kicking butt after a bad break-up, even when it’s posted on every newsstand. My go-to gals were Sandra Bullock and Eva Longoria. Their boys and mine were all a little too selfish in the relationship. But seeing how they moved on and dealt with it in a classy manner inspired me to also say “forget him.”

Exercise is like free therapy. It often clears the mind and makes you feel good about yourself. Upload a list of happy songs onto your iPod and get running! Beyonce became my best friend during my break-up. “Irreplaceable” and “Run the World” were instant jams in my “I hate boys” state of mind. Take your aggression out in any physical way possible whether it be boxing, swimming, biking or running. Releasing that built up energy will feel great afterwards.

College is a world full of new people for those living on a large campus. Join a club, volunteer or get to know who you are living with better.Focusing attention on others’ lives will distract you from your break-up and maybe even cause a little something called happiness. If you do happen to meet someone “special”, first ask yourself if you are ready. A key question: would you be jealous if your ex got a new girlfriend? If the answer is yes- you may not be ready to move on because of those feelings. Being 102 percent comfortable with yourself and your ex’s love life is key to moving on.

1) DON’T: go on a shopping spree! Bad for your wallet and your conscience.

2) DON’T: be over dramatic on Facebook or Twitter. You will just regret it and most people won’t understand.

3) DON’T: stay in a bed for a week. You are missing out on a wonderful life (and fresh air).

4) DON’T: eat tubs and tubs of Ben and Jerry’s. Even if the tub has real people names, they’re not your best friends!

5) DON’T: give up hope. Boys should not be banned from your life because they’re not all the same. It may take just one guy to ruin it, but it also takes one to give you hope.