Dealing with ‘Rude’ Relatives/Questions at Christmas!

- ‘Really, really.  You must be kidding me.’ ~Shelly’s inner response when asked a rude question.

Ah – Christmas!  The time for family gatherings!  Food, fun, and sometimes, embarrassing moments and rude questions.  While every Classy CL lady knows not to ask questions about ex-boyfriends, failing a semester, or gaining weight; others do not.  Here are our tips to handling the ‘awkward’ questions from our ‘loved’ ones:

Situation:  You walk into the family holiday party.  Recently broken up with your boyfriend, your nosy aunt ask ‘Where is Shawn?  He was such a nice fellow.  You two made such a cute couple.’

What you want to say:  ‘Really, he cheated on me and was a total jerk.’

What you Should say:  ‘We decided to head our separate ways.’  Then immediately shift the conversation with a compliment to your nosy aunt related to her hairstyle, attire, or favorite dish she always brings to the event.

Situation: Your over-competitive cousin, who has a 4.0 GPA, makes a bee-line for you as you walk in.  You immediately remember that you barely based micro-biology, but hey, you passed.  Your cousin states ‘Well, another semester in the books.  How did you do?’

What you want to say: Well, I can’t write it – much too naughty.

What you Should say: ‘Wow, Fall was a great semester.  My classes were great, and now I am ready to head into the Spring semester.  What does your course load look like?’ (When your cousin continues to talk about how smart they are, state ‘Wow, how do you do it?’)

Situation:  While you feel absolutely fantastic about yourself, others view differently.  (Let’s be honest, others are entirely cruel).  Your mean aunt (your critic) walks up to you and goes, ‘College has done well for you, it looks like you have put on a few?’

What you want to say:  Well, you want to cry.

What you Should say:  ‘Wow, interesting comment.  I feel fantastic, have fantastic friends, and am loving college.   That is really what matters.  How have you been?’

While we are classy ladies, do remember others lack this quality.  Some of our relatives will pose questions which make no sense.  Answer briefly and positively, and move the conversation to a compliment or asking the individual how they are doing?

Happy Holidays!

Shelly A Marie, MS, RD, LDN, is the Executive Director of College Lifestyles.  When asked a ‘rude’ question, she always tilts her head slightly and responds with ‘impressive.’  And yes, she has a very, very rude aunt with whom she is convinced flies in on a broom stick to Christmas gatherings.